Pringles For Breakfast

I’m Hilarious

I’m hilarious!
Someone told me that today - and it didn’t even take a game of Russian Roulette!

Change

So, my probably seems simple enough - I’m too dependent on other people for my own happiness.

Spending time. Talking (in person or via electronics). Anything. I’m the type of person that will give up whatever I want to do to better fit in with the crowd (be it very big or something seemingly small, a la watching The Dictator instead of anything else because everyone else wanted to). I can derive happiness from being around (certain?) people, even if the activity itself is of no interest to me.

And I do that. A lot.

That needs to change, I think. Because, unlike me, others don’t seem interested in doing this. If they want to hang out/chat, sure, they might think of me. But otherwise they can go hours/days/weeks/months/years without so much as even thinking of me (unless I initiate contact) - its as if my existence does not matter. At all.

And for me to be someone that bases happiness on these people … well, quite simply, what the fuck am I doing with my life? Why do I care so much when they care so little?

…

I’ve thought about this before. I’ve tried to change this attitude. Safe to say, I’ve failed. But I might as well try again now.

There is so much in life - so many people are able to be happy without requiring other people to make them happy. Hell, I used to be like that before … before I threw my life into a fire. Fucking idiot that I am.

So I might as well try again.

…

Yes, I have spent the last (too long) basing my happiness on you - if you’ll talk to me, or respond to my email, or randomly meet me, or whatever, then I’m happy, and if not, then I feel sad and incompetent and like a bad friend. It was stupid. If you do, great. If you don’t … great. I have my own life, for better or worse, and I’ll find something to keep myself happy.

After all, isn’t that what life is about?

Friendship

I’m a failure, I think.
You could ask my friends … you know, if I had any.

That Realization You Get…

It is now 6:11 PM on Saturday.

…

Today is Saturday.
Holy shit.

The More I Think…

I’m chasing a rainbow - a futile endeavor.
And it doesn’t help that I don’t know how to walk.
Rainbows wait for no one. Especially not losers.

99 (2009)

I’m still looking to hit my century in life - hopefully I don’t have to go through as much as these guys did.
I like Boman Irani’s character’s idea that everyone has the same amount of luck - its just that the timing differs by person. The problem, of course, is knowing when it is your time. And his “signs” thing is a bit weird, but maybe it actually works?

Also love the cell phone “joke” they have going…
Hold it up to the ear, brain khatam.
Put it in the chest pocket, heart khatam.
Put it in your pant pocket… the next generation khatam.

Ab, mujhe century marna hai zindagi mein.